And mother, I am so very sorry. You had spent nine, long months molding and creating me. Perfecting the shell that holds my personality within. Just for me to deprive it of food when it screams for it. To cut open the shell when I feel like I am trapped. For me to look in the mirror and scream and cry because I do not like what I see. I cannot help but to destroy the creation you worked so hard on, and for that I am sorry. Your creation deserved someone who knew how to take care of it.
| — | (via bruisedxgalaxies) |
This was intended to be a spoken word poem, but I will never be strong enough to read it to anyone.
(TW - Suicide, depression)
You’re broken, but you have no clue why.
Instead of living life like a zombie, you wish you could just cry.
You joke about suicide, because you dream of committing it.
And yes, you have depression. You’re just too scared to admit it.
Numbness you call it? Numb you say? “Just choose to be happy! It’s a waste of time being sad every day!’’
Why has it become socially accepted to be so un okay?
Another depressed teen? Well, what can you say?
Other people have it worse, no, you’re not that bad.
There are more important things in the world than you being a little sad.
Maybe it’s to cover up the fact that you’re just so lazy.
Or maybe it’s for attention; you fragile little daisy.
The voices are taking over, and your mind is so confused.
You used to be able to tell, what was them and what was you.
But now… you’ve moulded into one dark, twisted creation.
You’ve lost yourself in the battle against your own desperation.
You have a broken soul and a broken mind.
This is not okay, and you are not ‘’just fine’’
If you get tired, learn to rest, not to quit.
| — | Words getting me through dedicated study for Step 2 (via mdintraining) |
